It is hard as women when you are trying to manage a home and manage all of those crazy schedules (with work, school, other activities), sometimes stress gets the better of you and make it difficult to control your emotions. In general, our emotional reactions to any situation has a strong possiblility of making things worse. Making sure that our emotions are in check is a treat we need as women and mothers.
Here are five quick tips to help you have better control over your emotions:
1. Learn to respond instead of react
Take a moment to pause and consider what just happened instead of just instantly reacting to new information of a new situation. By taking a few seconds to pause and consider, you can calm yourself briefly and you will be likely to produce a better response.
2. Focus on what you can control
Once you have been presented with a stressful or emotional situation, try to identify what you can and can’t control. If something is done, you can’t change it. You can only determine what to do now.
You can control your response, and to a certain degree, you can likely control what happens next by focusing on what you can control, you are empowering yourself. By dwelling on things you can’t control, you disempower yourself and make yourself more frustrated and more stressed.
3. Figure out what’s important NOW
When you are presented with a challenging saturation in life, it’s important to prioritize what things you have to act on now. If, for example, you arrive at a doctor's appointment, get out of your car, then realize that you just locked your keys in the car, what’s important now? The appointment is important now, not your keys. You can deal with the locked car at any time later in the day. Maybe even see when you go into the building you ask someone about it when you get in.
So many people freak out about little urgent matters and lose sight of what’s really important for them to focus on first. Again, by taking a few moments to pause and consider, you can refocus your mind on what’s most important right now and prioritize your plan of action.
4. Know that you can handle anything
It’s been said that if people made a circle, put their problems in the middle, and had to pick a problem to take back out, most people would pick their own problem to retrieve. Whatever challenges you’re facing that may cause stress or negative emotions, you can handle them.
This old man once suggested that we ask ourselves this question in times of stress:
"Am I going to die right now?"
If the answer is “no,” then realize that you CAN handle the situation. Sure, some situations are extremely difficult to deal with, but step by step, we can find solutions and move forward.
5. Change the meaning you give to “negative" events
Nothing in life has any meaning except the meaning we give it.
by Tony Robbins
The more you practice the points above (especially pausing to respond and realizing that you can handle any challenge), the more you will start to view challenging events as more neutral than negative. You’ll even start finding the good in difficult situations in terms of what lessons you can learn, skills you can develop, and new motivation you can gain.
This skill of turning negative into positive develops like a muscle and becomes almost instinctive time. Start by saying “No Problem” a whole lot more. Pretty soon, you’ll condition your mind to believe it.
Practice these five steps, and you will find yourself feeling less stress and feeling more in control of your emotions on a day-to-day basis.
Learn to respond instead of react
Focus on what you can control
Figure out what’s important now
Know that you can handle anything
Change the meaning you give to “negative” events
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